The best rewards ever.

3 of our 8th graders: Fenzy, Bertha
and Mason (on right)

                 I waited an extra week to write again because I was looking for something particular to tell you about. I didn't want to force something out just to keep up regular postings. But I do have something I really want to share with you today. The rewards and benefits I get here. Now since I am a volunteer and you are helping me survive daily expenses, I don't really get much "benefits" from my job other than free housing and a paid for visa (which is still pretty good). But I've been given different priceless rewards teaching these kids.

        Honestly, I've always enjoyed kids a lot. But after working at a low-class day care for 2 years, I needed a break from child-care. But in this school kids come from public schools where shaming is considered discipline, and classroom philosophy is basically survival of the fittest, meaning some of the transfer kids in 3rd grade had not even learned to read yet. But it is absolutely incredible to witness what love and one-on-one attention can accomplish! One example I experienced was our 8th grade kids. They are the oldest in the school and Ms. Sarah has been working with them to become leaders and role-models to the other kids. So since about 3-4 weeks ago I've been tasked with helping them prepare and learn their skit for their upcoming convention. Trust me when I say it was not all fun and games. Everyday at 2:45pm I would announce to them we had to go out to practice and everytime I was met with: "Oh Miss Julia we don't want to. We want to get our work done!" "Schoolwork is more important!" "It's fine Miss Julia we don't need to practice!" "Why do we always have to practice?"           
                                         -I mean...what kind of complaints are those???!!!

(f.l.) Mason, Bertha and Corvie performing their skit!

But I insisted they practice their skit, and set a deadline for them to have it all memorized! This last week they were expected to perform the skit and 2 songs for their peers, and when the day finally came, they were nervous but ready! They even preferred the skit to be the last event because it "was the best!" Their classmates loved it and laughed in all the right places! Before the performance I did a pep-talk circle with them and we prayed and got them pumped. It was an incredible experience to watch them work hard and stretch themselves, step outside of their comfort zones and perform. A cool side-story was on performance day we were preparing downstairs while the K-1st had their break. When the bell sounded Fenzy and Corvie (8th gr) were acting all old and tough and got 15 little kids lined up as they were supposed to, quieted them down, prayed with them and guided them into the classroom, while  Mr. Jorge and I just watched them entirely impressed. Don't they just sound like great kids?!

Christina and I
at the beach today

            I want to tell you about some kids who have been special to me especially these first few weeks. First is 13 year old Christina (who also goes by Makayla), I had mentioned her before when I told you about having to stay late with a student and help with Math homework. Well this was Christina. We're pretty certain she is dyslexic so she struggles to get through reading and understanding instructions in her books. But she is so smart! Well I have spent a lot of time with her 1-on-1 in class and so we have just kinda become buddies. On the day of my birthday she came up to me with a picture she had drawn for me (It said "Lordy, lordy look who's 24!) and was just beaming with pride and excitement when she gave me a big hug. Probably the best gift I have ever received! Oh and btw, she excitedly announced yesterday that she had read and understood the instructions in her math-book all by herself, and today after going to the beach she told me she planned to get all of her work done on time Monday! We'll see how that goes!
         The other I wanted to tell you about was Mason (pictured above). Mason is the school-president and he is 15 years old. Mason is also roughly 6 ft tall! I'm estimating but I'm pretty sure that is a legit estimation. He is a good kid, an amazing cook and such a great leader at the school. Any time Mason hears a kid giving me unnecessary attitude he snaps at them and tells them to behave and speak respectfully (he does this for most teachers). Along with his insanely contagious chuckle, gentle spirit and genuine heart, we are all certain he will become a great man one day!

This school has many more of these precious kids who continually make me feel like I have been rewarded better than I could have ever imagined! This is why I chose this field.

Love,

Jules

           

I'm an independent person! almost...

Helping Keren memorize the Beatitudes in English... was quite the
  struggle....I felt so bad for her because she had to learn the KJV,
and she is barely learning English with me as it is...
Foto: Juan Funez

                  Update on overcoming fear:  I took a taxi by myself three times this week!!!! Let me tell you the stories on these moments of personal growth! So Tuesday night, I'm home alone while Deborah and Sarah are out teaching. I get a message saying: "hey let"s go to dinner at this place! Take a taxi and meet us here!"  I suddenly get super stressed and inquisitive...I'm like: "Okay, lets do this! But when should I leave to meet you on time? What do I tell the driver? How much will it cost me? And will I get ripped off?" Well, they gave me all the info I needed and said if I saw any of our kids from school in the neighborhood they would probably like to help me! So I walk down the hill from our house (mind you it gets dark here after 6 pm...so... its already dark!) I get down to the area right before the main road and look around to see if any of the kids are hanging out. Guess who I saw: My girl Makayla, who I helped yesterday for over an hour in math. So I walk up to her and go: "Soooooo, you feel like helping me out in return for helping you with your math?" I told her it was my first time taking a taxi by myself and my Spanish is not very good yet. She smiled and said "yeah!" So with her and two other younger kids we went out to the road. They explained to me that the taxis will beep when they pass you and you just stick out your hand and wave for them to stop. When we got a taxi she told the driver where to take me and got a good price for me! When I got in and the car took off, the kids yelled "bye" after me and another passenger in the car looked at me in surprise and asked me how I knew the kids, I told her I was a teacher in their neighborhood, and she goes: "Ooooh! That makes so much sense!"

Sweet little Patrick whose family
lives down the road.

        A few days later I had to go to the doctor to get something checked out and I passed by Makayla's house on my way to the road, she goes: "Miss Julia, do you need help getting a taxi again?" I returned: "Do you want to help me again?" She answers: "Yeah I should help you because I heard you practicing Spanish today and you're not very good with the speaking yet!" Well....I can't really argue that yet, so I let them help me again and I'm glad I did. BUT getting back from the doctors office was a little bit more tricky. I successfully waved down the taxi ..but when I got in and told him the name of my neighborhood he had no clue where that was. So I just motioned for him to go straight (there is only one main road on the island so it goes everywhere). I kept an eye out for landmarks I memorized (because addresses are not real things here, my maps app is the most useless thing i have at the moment) and when we reached it I just said "aqui por favor!" (here please) and he stopped! Not bad for my first time being an independent person, if I do say so myself!!!

         Update on my classes: My Kindergarten kids are able to identify colors, and numbers for the most part. I'm beginning to teach them to ask each other "What's your name?". They love singing our "Good Morning Song" And they think "Head, shoulders, knees and toes" song is awesome. Fun fact: One of the hardest words for them to pronounce so far is "Ears" the sounds that come out when I point to my ears are hilarious! And I utterly regret teaching them to say "I don't knooowww!" Because now they like to use that to get out of harder questions....(of course that phrase they remember!)
My Elementary girls are super silly. Their favorite part of class is when we play GoFish at the end of a lesson. They actually know a lot of basic phrases but they simply lack a lot of Vocabulary. Tried teaching them family members this week...let me tell ya... Trying to explain in English what and aunt and uncle is....NOT as easy as one would think!! But they are cute! Friday I decided should be an English game day, so we played Pictionary and Hangman and GoFish. FYI, I generally don't believe in letting kids win everything (or participation prizes for that matter) just because they are kids (and I usually have to win in order to make the games move along or finish up class, a burden I know!) but I had to let them win a few times because they were getting seriously depressed haha. I still didn't let them win everything though.......
                             I'm not competitive! You are! Whatever!
But Go Fish is the only game I refuse to let them win on if they didn't earn it. We have played it many times now and they know what to do, so I give no mercy! And a few of them have beat me several times already!
               I really am loving teaching at this school! We had a teachers 'party' this week and it was fun to bond with the people I work with! It's a great team! Everyone is good at their job and everyone works their best at all times!
Below you can see a picture of Mr Jorge, who leads the K-2nd grade room, helping the Kindergarten kids learn their monthly scripture during the end of the day exercises!

Update on me: Health has been a bit tricky as of late! But the doctor we go to is super sweet and very well respected! He also has two kids attending our school! But it's getting better and I'm taking my medicine! So hopefully by the time I write again I will be decently healthy! Funds are still around the $3000 mark! So please keep praying for that! There's quite a bit of sickness going around some of our kids and teachers (Flu season knows no borders as well) and we are all in a very tight space so germs galore (It's possible I got everyone else sick). Some of the older kids are preparing for a convention on the mainland. It will be exciting for them because none of them have ever even been on a plane! 

I start adult evening classes the week after next! It will be an entirely different experience for sure! Please pray for that whilst I prepare!

Love,

Jules

Outside of ESL classes....

What's up? How's life? Eventful in mostly good ways I hope! Well, my week was a little less eventful...or kinda eventful yet...not fun I guess. Well I got a cold from cold wind+ wet hair combination last Sunday night! Yes it happens that fast for me. And then Tuesday night I woke up with a fever, and it continued on and off, until Thursday morning. Unfortunately I did not get to work the rest of the week. :/ Finally Friday we went to the Doctor and after some samples and blood tests, I found out Saturday that I have a Parasite and a bacterial infection and a cold...yaaayyy...Thankfully this all explains the issues I have been having health-wise and I am now on two different medications and antibiotics and hopefully on the mend! But I do feel much better than I have, and I have been assured I will be back to normal once I'm through with the meds. FUN STUFF HUH!?
Yeah I know it's not super exciting stuff, like last week but it is the non-glamorous side of traveling and I feel like sometimes a balance is necessary ;)

But not to bore you with my sick days.....I will tell you about what I usually do in school after I am done with my lessons! Since my classes only last from 10am -12:30pm, I go upstairs to the older kids (2nd grade+) and basically help students correct their homework, and help them when they get stuck on their work. To my dismay I have become a go to person for basic math... my mom is going to laugh and say: " I TOLD YOU, YOU WERE GOOD AT IT!" Well ....yes mom I have been able to successfully help kids with long-division, geometry, subtractions and multiplications so far (I had to reteach myself the long-divison). And I may have had to correct some of my advice I gave to the kids. But teachers are always learning too! I was helping one of the older boys Mason with his Geometry and he had to find the area and the perimeter for a set of shapes and he wasn't getting the answers quite right. So I had to explain the formulas to him again and I had him show me which sides you add or multiply. After he got the answers corrected for one of the shapes I patted him on the shoulder and barely took 3 steps away when he turns around wide-eyed and goes:" Where are you going?? I still need help!"  A little shocked he really wanted my help, I go: "Oh....um. Okay! Sure!"  (I say shocked because when I didn't quite understand what he was supposed to do he said:" Miss Julia go look at the score key, it will help." .....it did). He's the sweetest boy who is in 8th grade and about a good few inches taller than I am!


Last week I was helping a girl with her vocabulary, because each subject gives the kids new vocabulary for them to learn in English and Spanish, so I was having her explain the meanings of her vocab, and on one of the words she was trying to tell me: "It's what a butterfly is before it gets wings." And I was pretty certain that Cuba was not a caterpillar in Spanish. I told her they were talking about the country, and she was 100% certain I was wrong since I didn't know Spanish. We went back and forth for a few minutes and I ended up grabbing my co-worker Juan, who only speaks Spanish and he told her they were indeed talking about the country.  I may have celebrated that victory a little too much, but man winning an argument with a child is quite the accomplishment sometimes - you parents out there don't lie!!

These kids are awesome! Very intelligent and precious and I am loving working with them!

Love,

Jules

God is providing.

                   OH.MY.GOODNESS!! So much to tell! So! First week of school! C-r-a-z-y!! The first day of school started Tuesday, so I had Monday to lay out my lesson plans and mentally prepare myself. Which I needed because I was very nervous! I have a lot of experience being around Kindergarten and Elementary age kids, but I have never really taught English to this age-group... and considering 99% of the Kindergarten kids do not  speak English, I was worried!! But my sweet teacher friends reassured me and Deborah basically said I could do whatever I wanted. Only guideline I have is the speaking English PACE 1 which does not have that much in it. So I did A LOT of research for both lessons. Fast forward to Tuesday morning, I came into school around 8:30-ish just to get an idea of morning routines. Don't remember if I elaborated on this but the Kids have a morning "exercise" routine where they sing an active worship song, pray, sing the Honduran national anthem, pledge to the same flag, and two other pledges to the christian flag and the bible, then they read or recite a passage of scripture together, and finally announce any big accomplishments of the students. Anyways, at 9.30 I went downstairs to the younger kids classroom to get ready for my lesson.  I looked over my plan again and then went to collect all my kids (which took a sec because other kids tried to sneak in, and a few actually did which I didn't realize until today...no wonder they were so good...), and we settled down on this small blanket in the corner of the classroom. So with 8 Kindergarten kids (should have been 6😀) I began lessons with the method we had been taught at OC to be "total physical response method" where kids learn English words through actions and moving their bodies. So I started the lesson with simple commands that I could demonstrate: like "stand up" or "sit down" or "walk in a circle" - the kids really enjoyed this and it was a fun activity. We may have been distracting the other kids a little bit. :). Through a few different activities I was able to get all their names, numbers 1-5 and a few colors. I taught them a "Good Morning" song which my 5th grade English teacher had taught us (it's still a work in progress, but it's their favorite thing). I was surprised the K-kids turned out to be MUCH easier going than I had expected. I do have to remind them of boundaries since they just started school but overall they are so precious.
                 So at 11:30 I had my Elementary girls (pictured above). These girls are fun, because they have a few different levels of English speakers, but since I only have 5 of them I am able to have them help each other out. Lessons with them over the past week have been quite experimental because I'm still figuring out how much English they actually speak. I had one day where I did some harder activities and it made for a very slow lesson. But the next day I adjusted them slightly and it got much better! They are all beautiful little spirits, I have shy Tiffany, sassy Sachy, happy Keren, eager Onice and adorable Llarelli! Apparently my English lessons have become popular, because I had a few kids (who are fluent English speakers) come up and tell me they needed more practice so they needed to join my class...it was heart-breaking having to tell them no.... :)
               

     I will give you a slight update on my adjustment process: I successfully ordered food in Spanish! It only took me like 3 words but it was a milestone for me! I also started teaching a private student on Tuesday, she is in her 30s and simply wants to improve her conversation skills. We spent our first lesson just laughing and getting to know each other. It was sweet! Her husband works at a resort and she said she wanted to invite me there and cook for me..my response: YAH! She has two little sons who are so precious! I was supposed to have my first Spanish lesson this last weekend but I got sick Thursday-Saturday so I was knocked out pretty much the whole time, so we didn't meet up. Hopefully next week though! Apparently my body is going to make this adjustment a little difficult so please pray for that! My digestion is especially annoying right now...

Saturday night (I was feeling a bit better) the mission group that has been here this past week was invited to a traditional Island dinner at Mazy's house (She is a mother of one of our school kids). So this island dinner consisted of banana dumplings, flour dumplings, fish, pig tail, plantains, and cooked bananas. My digestion was still on the mend so  I wasn't able to eat much. But I tried everything except the pig tail - not ready for that yet. One day.... But they had prepared some interesting questions for Mazy and it was basically a night of learning about island culture and what life was like before tourism took over. Really cool experience!

Sunday morning I attended church with my friend Esther (she's a teacher at school with me). I got to ride one of the busses they have here for the first time and the road to our church was AWFUL! Sooo many potholes everywhere! Church was a nice service! It is lead by American Missionaries and most of the families there are Expat-families so it was all in English. Apparently its known as the "Gringo-church" (white church). I plan on visiting other churches too though. The nice thing about this church is it takes place in a big conference room of a resort out in West Bay and the people who go to church there are allowed to use the pool and chairs out on the beach. So this is what Esther and I did for the rest of the afternoon. We laid out by the pool and talked and I even got to snorkel later that day! It was a terrifying experience because I had to keep anxiety of breathing through my mouth only under control!! But the reefs are so cool! And the experience of looking into the water and only hearing your breathing so loud in your head is so strange yet so cool!

           The good experiences just keep adding up. The importance of community is so refreshing and the mentality of island culture is really interesting! Esther was telling me about switching from her previous job to teaching at school, and the switch caused a decrease in pay for her, so she told me how she simply had to trust that God would provide. I told her I was having a hard time trusting in this and learning this over the past few months, she responded and told me: "You know Julia, one thing Islanders are really good at is trusting that God will provide. Because for us, that's all we can do. I didn't think I was going to have enough money for this next week but then someone yesterday overpaid on purpose for a bracelet I made (she makes and sells jewelry on weekends),  and now I do have enough until the next payday!"
One of the best things here is I get to hear and see God be active every day. Because being reliant upon oneself is not priority #1. So this is how I am trying to dismiss my fear, by training myself to truly believe and act upon the belief, that God will provide. Of course easier said than done. But I know this is something God wants to work on with me, so that's what we're doing!

Please keep praying for my co-worker, she is back at work, and happy to be here but I know it's going to have good days and bad. Keep praying for my funds, and financial stuff. I believe God will provide, but I still get tired and anxious from seeing reminder-emails of payments and such, and they don't seem to want to leave me alone (because sometimes random new things will pop up). Pray for health please. My body is feeling very tired,sick, and exhausted, and it's struggling to transition. I hope this wasn't too much to throw at you!

Trust me!

                It has now been 7 days since I arrived in this hot and humid climate! And to update you I have started to slowly tune out the rooster that likes to scream outside our house at 3 am. Still taking everything in! This last week I have been in training! I got to learn about the different curriculum that Samuel Raymond Christian School implements. So this is really different from a typical classroom set up. Basically you start off by testing the students level of learning abilities and then they get their material prescribed in correlation with their specific levels. For each subject there is a workbook and accompanying text, along with check up tests and quizzes to test comprehension. The students gets to work through his/her work at their own pace, without worrying about comparing their progress to other students or falling behind the rest of the class. The teachers keep up with the students work, and provide 1-on-1 tutoring as needed. Well, despite this very different way of learning at this school, my ESL classes will not really be in this fashion but still in a small group of students. So my priorities will be 2 ESL classes for new incoming students, one for 8 Kindergarten students at 10am and then another for four 2nd and 3rd grade students at 11:30am. After that I will be helping out with the other classes until school ends, which I will let you know what that looks like once I do it. :) (I will be getting some evening adult classes in a few weeks)

           I've been asked about my adjustment here and so far I can tell you, I'm still taking things in. The only things I'm currently "adjusting" to would be the trash that lies around and the lack of clear set structure in cities and neighborhoods. But growing up in Germany they employ people to keep the city looking so clean, and on the island regular trash pick-up is just not a luxury they have. And there is a certain beauty to the lack of structure in the cities! I have no doubt I will come across culture shock at some point but I'm trying to be aware and take things in slowly so that I can be prepared when it does creep up on me.
I will tell you that the animals and critters are not my favorite... aside from the untalented rooster that decides to scream (I say scream, because it does not sound like your typical cok-a-doodle-doo) every 10 minutes starting at 3 am in the morning, I suspected a mouse to be the source of squeaking noise and little scratches on wood which I heard...NOPE, apparently the squeaking are the bats that hang around outside, and the scratching on wood are Geckos that got into the house....comforting....SPEAKING of Geckos.....I was peacefully enjoying morning coffee on a hammock on our porch when a giant Gecko dropped from the ceiling onto my neck and crawled across my chest!!! You have never seen me move so fast IN MY LIFE!! I walked around the house grossed out for like 30 minutes just muttering: "Ew ew ew ew ew ew ew ew ew ew!!!"

           So my Spanish is coming along here and there. I had an epic fail when I stopped by a gas station to get some food and it was my first time ordering by myself... So the guy working the register spoke English which was great. Ordered Baleadas (which are like thick tortillas with refried beans and cheese: SO GOOD) and asked for chorizo on them. Paid, got my change and I got a receipt to give the lady making the Baleadas. From the last time we had ordered I thought I was just handing her the ticket and wouldn't have to worry about speaking to her, since I could tell English was not going to be an option. WELL, little did I know that my special request for chorizo was not on the ticket, so she got my attention and asked what I wanted on it. Me, being TOTALLY caught off guard, go: "Oh....what?" even though I totally understood what she said and could've easily said: "Chorizo, por favor." NOPE!!!! Being so nervous, I played dumb and this stranger next to me gave me this look of pity and said: "Oh she asked what you wanted on it"......yeah I totally played along for the rest of the conversation...and left the store so very embarrassed because I understood everything said in front of me but was too scared to try and speak my broken Spanish in public!
Fear is going to be one of my big challenges these next 10 months. I will have to overcome the fear of using imperfect Spanish, because essentially this is how you learn languages...by making mistakes and correcting them. Another fear I see coming is going out to do things on my own, which I typically enjoy, but now makes me nercous considering I have to take a bus or taxi everywhere and maps are pretty useless in a place where my address is "The Treehouse behind the Carwash." Another fear I know will be socializing or trying to in my case. As an introvert I'm comfortable being by myself often, but I do want to come from this experience with new connections. And one of my goals of my time here is to practice making new and real connections.
I was reading my Book "Glory Days" by Max Lucado yesterday, and he was describing the part of the story after Joshua had victory over Jericho and they moved on to conquer other towns but they failed because one of the Israelites had betrayed the pledge he took to not touch any of Jericho's treasure. He describes this action of the Israelite as a deliberate distrust in God. Taking something valuable like Gold or Silver he could've decided he wanted it as back-up in case something went wrong. Emergency fund, if you will! Or is captured he could buy his way out of trouble. All things that require zero trust in God. I think fear does that to me all the time. Especially, when finances are involved. God asks me to trust him to provide in every situation, and like I did at the Gas station, I always like to play it safe. So in case I make a mistake, the consequences won't be too bad. My mom once told me this was basically self-sabotage. So my goal this year is to not let fear control my actions. I want take the risk and make a fool of myself practicing Spanish, or getting lost (really though, getting lost on an island is probably not as bad as anywhere else) while out navigating on my own. So please the next time we chat or you want an individual update, feel free to ask me what I've done to overcome my fears! Because there will most likely be a funny story of me embarrassing myself involved! Trust me!



            Few other updates: I'm close to passing the $3000 mark on my fundraising. I can still receive funds through PayPal on roatanhorizons.com. Please, please, please pray for my transition into this new climate especially, I'm having some allergic reactions and the humidity is not kind on my asthma, but nothing horribly yet. If you could please pray for one of my fellow teachers here, her name is Lorissa, she is a few years older than me, her dad went into the hospital tuesday because he had  pneumonia for a while and it was causing him pain, and he passed away later that day. She is a strong woman but I am sure she and her mom and young sister who is 10 will need every prayer of comfort they can get.
Thank you for joining me on this journey! Feel free to contact me personally for updates!

Love,

Jules

Only one more week!!

Let Me Update You!

               So I left off the last post with a "to be continued" vibe, and here is the latest update! I've been trying to get my motivation into gear, which includes canceling my car insurance, deferring loans, canceling amazon subscription, as well as my WiFi bill... so much stuff tying me down...

               I even started laying out clothes to pack, and made an entire list of what all I need to bring! Now I have always loved the idea of simplifying my life down to one bag travel type of person...but I've come to realize this is going to be a very hard thing to accomplish... partially due to the fact that I absolutely hate having an 'empty' living space. It's so depressing to me and just does not feel like home. Also I am a very sentimental person... things can have value for the dumbest reasons and only when its 5 years later and I can't remember that reason does that thing get thrown out. It's a little embarrassing really...haha. Nevertheless moving and sorting and packing is the lifestyle that I signed up for when I moved across the Atlantic. Btw, for those of you being so kind and helpful about moving/ storing things, or keeping things for me, you have no idea how grateful I am. I do not have the luxury of just keeping my things with my parents because that would entail me shipping everything thousands of miles. Honestly for any international student/person this is probably one of the most helpful things you could do for them because storage units are expensive and its always a stressful process to do this on a regular basis just fyi! And for me personally it's right up there with financial responsibilities...

Anyways I finally got up the motivation today to start cleaning things, and then in my "procrastinative" nature sat down to finish this draft I've had open for days, because a new 'lesson' has been on my mind as of late and actually it accompanies the last one I told you about my battle with fears and worry. So in church they've been teaching from the book of Nehemia; and the last two Sundays I attended (I've been a little lazy...sorry!) have focused on Chapter 4 where the Israelites are trying to rebuild Jerusalem's walls and they are discouraged already to begin with because so many before them had failed, but then on top of that they were being challenged by enemies who didn't want them to succeed. Those enemies were seen and unseen. So our preacher pointed out a few things that got my attention, because they were those things you hear and then go: "Really God?.. okokokok I'm hearing ya!"
         1. We are more likely to cave/give up to the roaring lion trying to devour us, when we are tired,                lonely or discouraged.
         2.  We usually want things fixed the quick way -> we look for a pill to medicate our problems
         3. Nehemia's plan involved prayer first and armed guards at the identified weaknesses in the                    wall.
Okay, I am well aware these are not earth-shattering bits of information to anyone..BUT! I know you have had those moments when all is going wrong and you're trying to learn from it and someone says the most generic, basic thing and it just shifts your perspective on your circumstances. Well I'm in that place right now. Every mountain I had to overcome last year would always make me want to give up on graduating. Well even now, the fear of not getting my finances together, lack of motivation to pack up my things, and ever more tasks that keep building up just keep beating down my energy and willingness to do something that is taking so much effort. So far my method has been "well that's the plan so its going to have to happen somehow." But I would much rather train myself to not look for a quick fix for everything and instead reach for prayer first. Next I would love to find my weaknesses and learn to work through them without throwing a tantrum.
       Anyone up for teaching me how to do my taxes?????
                        This may endanger whatever relationship we have, I will not be responsible for any emotional or physical harm we both may or may not experience...jk.....maybe..😀😁

For the update part: With my fundraising I am passing the 3000$ mark, and mind you a few weeks ago I kept telling people: "Well I think this is where God wants me so He's going to have to provide, because we both know I ain't no good at this."     WELL........ This is God saying "WATCH ME."    ;)
I am a week out and trying to scram to get everything packed up and organized because let's face it. I'm a last minute type of person..... But I am also collecting useful material to take with me and already getting a BIT nervous! Thank you for your support and all your kind words. I love getting to share this with you guys!

Love,

Jules

Battling my Jericho.

               Just to update you! There is a total of roughly $1250 raised, I'm incredibly grateful and feel so much love from those of you who have donated! It's a crazy experience. But of course being the worrisome person I am, it stresses me out needing $5000 by February... but this is a learning experience for me, and I am determined to welcome the harsh lesson of not being in control.

       Let me explain. Finances terrify me. Not a hard concept to understand for sure, and I know I am not the only person out there who hates the institution that controls all of our lives.... (I may or may not be feeling dramatic at this moment). The difficulty I have is the dependency that is required of finances to live our lives. Especially in my case which sometimes involves flying to another continent, money is the way to do it. We all know that Love/Hate relationship all to well. My fear is rooted strongly in my inability to have decent control over my finances... I'm terrible at being responsible in this area of my life, I make no secret of it. I can promise you, if you were to come give me some financial paperwork to fill out I would sit down and burst into tears.. BUT give me a room full of 24 first graders who speak no English and I say: "Challenge accepted!!" with utter excitement. I know for other people the idea of a room full of children to take care of is a terrifying picture haha.

       Now that I have graduated from formal education, its time for God's lessons. In order to not get trapped in a cycle of trying to earn money and pay bills, I saw a chance for God to teach me something every chance He gets. WELL, ladies and gentlemen the lessons have begun! 

First lesson: Your worst fear : no control over your financial situation

And just for the record...to me, having control would include me finding a decent paying job that could allow me to comfortably pay my bills etc. and lead a comfortable life. 

But who wants THAT kind of life???    **she asks while possibly hyperventilating**

SO! How is the lesson going so far? Well, I have been sending my dad very high medical bills to pass on to my insurance from my spider-bite  experience. I just got my paycheck yesterday and it made me depressed. The funds I had planned to save up for this period of my life were used for tuition money during the summer because I am not considered an in-state-student, even though out of all 5 years I have lived in the US, I've been in Oklahoma for 4 of those years.... but no I'm some kind of mix of international student or just domestically out-of-state. SO! I am well aware of the no control part of the lesson...yes its loud and clear!! hah. Meanwhile...low-key fear residing within me. 

       

       I know I need to learn to battle this fear of losing all control, and trust God to provide. But these things are always easier said than done. So today feeling utterly lost at how this could possibly work out... I got out an old book I had started a few months back. Its called "Glory Days" by Max Lucado. I really enjoyed this book, I just lost track of it over the last year. The chapter I had stopped on before was about God's people battling Jericho. Lucado points out that Jericho to God's people were the worst version of humanity. They were "their worst fear" if you will. But while Joshua and the Israelites were challenged to confront their worst fear, they technically did  nothing. God battled Jericho for them, all he asked of Joshua and His people were for them to center themselves around the ark and trust His instructions. Lucado explains that in the same way God asks us to center our lives around Him and trust. Our version of the ark just is replaced with meditating on God's word, or worshiping, or praying...instead of worrying, or trying to fight something that God could easily crush. Lucado described the spiritual battle in these situations as "strongholds" we are choosing to believe in. In my case they are strongholds that revolve around emotions of pride, defeat, and self-pity. Strange combination I know...especially since I just graduated! But these have always been around and they continuously manifest in other situations. For a while it was my education...now its my finances. Many of you know my 2017 was filled with a series of unfortunate events (*see what I did there? lol....I hope there is no copyright on that....if so smb please tell me)...but these all fueled the stronghold of self-pity and they continue to! At the same time, because I was not able to start fundraising in advance for the sake of my peace of mind, the idea that keeping my departure date the same is foolish fuels the stronghold of defeat...why try when it will fail anyways? Finally not having control of the outcome is hurting my pride immensely....which, let's face it, is a good thing...eventually. 

        I really can't say that everything will work out how I would like it too. It's probably a good thing that it doesn't..because this way I can take absolutely no credit for nothing...it will all go to God...since He is the one battling my Jericho. I guess it's time for me to do a better job and re-center my life and trust Him. Now that I have identified my strongholds...the only way I can even think of to fight them is to trust God.

Welcome!

          I'm glad you joined me. I can't wait to share my experiences and adventures with you. The purpose of this blog is to offer updates for people who care to follow along with my upcoming trip to Roatan, Honduras.

         Beginning in February until November of 2018, I have the privilege of teaching English as a volunteer for Roatan Horizons. Roatan Horizaons is a school through which  Deborah and Sarah Hunnicut provide an education to the kids in their village and English classes to adults throughout the island. Although I am graduating this December with a degree in "Teaching English as a Foreign Language" (TEFL), I am still a little nervous to make teaching a full-time gig. Although I've gotten to tutor and teach some during my time in college, I'm getting really excited to apply and explore the things I learned in my classrooms.

       While exploring job opportunities, I found a few different options for a full-time job as a teacher in Asia and even the Middle East. Despite this I decided that an opportunity like the one in Roatan, Honduras would never come again. What makes this one unique/ different? Let me explain.

     My sophomore year I heard Deborah Hunnicutt speak in a Sunday morning bible class. She was giving her testimony of a missions kid growing up to be a missionary and reporting on the progress her school in Roatan was making. My friend and I, who are both Mission kids, were fascinated with her story and after briefly speaking with her we realized...... "this could totally be us in the distant future!"
      Until Spring of 2017 Deborah and her work occasionally had crossed my mind, that's when it became time to confront the idea of becoming an official adult soon; while I had seriously considered going to Japan at the time, the reality of cultural differences and being a full-time employed teacher on top of this  started to unsettle me quite a bit. So, I began exploring my options.
     One day as I was sitting in the library, Deborah and her work crossed my mind again, and I felt the urge to see about working for her. I distinctively remember really enjoying her testimony and it seemed like a good option to investigate. When inquiring about jobs, she responded by saying they could use the help but that it would have to be volunteer-work. I prayed, thought about it, looked at the time line and my alternative options. Finally, compared to the other possibilities I saw , this position offered me an opportunity to learn how to serve humbly and live a genuine life helping others. I saw a chance to live and grow in a place that was very foreign, exciting and challenging but under the guidance of an experienced Adult-MK. A paid-professional career could always pick up after this.

    Moreover what I decided I desire most for my first year out of college, is personal, spiritual, and professional growth. Personal, because in the past few years I have struggled connecting with people because of the isolating lifestyle college created for me. Spiritual, because while God has done so much for me here, I only know Him where I can live-stream if I'm too tired to deal with people, or I can show up and leave church without having to connect with anybody. Professional, because I need to learn to teach without homework hanging over my head; I need to test out my abilities and challenge my weaknesses, and more importantly find new abilities and weaknesses. Finally, while there are many things I enjoy about my life here in OKC, I've been praying for guidance, mentor-ship and ultimately a break from a first world lifestyle.

      So while its all well and good that this is what I hoped for, I still had to apply and interview and plan etc. So over this summer, I had the chance to spend some time getting to know Deborah and her daughter Sarah while they were in OKC. After I spent one afternoon in very veery deep conversation with Deborah, my motivation and my desire to learn from her only grew. Why? Because she made me question my motives. She wanted me to be certain that I was not trying to escape my current place, she wanted me to be certain that I could live and integrate into a culture that was VERY different from either culture I knew so far. And that was good for me. For the first time in a long while I was challenged on a level that made me very uncomfortable. But after praying, thinking and processing my desires and my hopes for my future, I became even more certain that this was where God was calling me to.

     I can't tell you how excited I am to start this Journey. I can most certainly say that it will not be easy.... at all!! But I am looking forward to challenging the built up habits I have.
If you would like to read my letter about fundraising you can look for the post entitled "Love knows no boundaries." And if you would like any further information at all... Please send me a message, email, Fb, etc.

Loving without borders,

Jules